Episode 39: How to Repair After Conflict ("I'm Sorry You Feel That Way" Doesn't Cut It)

Aug 4

You snapped at your kid, felt bad, and then apologized with, “I’m sorry, but you should have listened the first time.” Or your partner says, “I’m sorry you feel that way” mid-argument, and it makes things even worse….

In this episode, couples & sex therapist Dr. Rebecca Howard Eudy and pelvic floor physical therapist Dr. Alexandra DiGrado talk through why so many apologies miss the mark, and what genuine repair looks like in parenting, partnerships, and everyday life. Dr. Rebecca also shares the story of a public blowup with a school crossing guard that still makes her cringe and what she did afterward to make it right.

Not all apologies are created equal. Tune in to learn the difference between a "sorry" that just clears your own conscience (...we’re all guilty of it) and one that actually protects your relationships for the long term.

You’ll learn:

Why a “but…” totally cancels out your apology
Why over-apologizing (especially as women) can make your words lose their meaning
Why a “forced march” doesn’t teach kids empathy (and what does)
How shame just keeps you stuck instead of helping you repair
Why modeling repair, not perfection, is what actually teaches your kids how to handle their own conflicts
Why feeling guilty about losing your cool doesn't mean you're a bad parent. It means you care enough to try better

Tune in if:

Your partner says, 'I'm sorry you feel that way' mid-argument, and you want to hit the ceiling
You lost your temper recently and aren't sure whether to move on or address it
You’re stuck between “I shouldn’t have yelled” and “but that behavior wasn’t okay either” when it comes to your kids
You didn’t grow up with parents who apologized, and you're trying to figure out how to do it differently

Helpful resources: